Monday 13 December 2010

HORSES

Horses don't use toilets
I'm quite relieved to say:
A horse stuck in my lavatory
Would probably ruin my day.

They dump their loads
On fields and roads,
And that is quite OK;
But if started copying them
I'd soon be locked away!
Shake, Rattle and Custard!

A jolly book is now on sale!
As a Christmas gift it cannot fail!
Crammed with poems, small and light,
It’ll make you chuckle on a winter’s night!
‘Shake, Rattle, and Custard!’ is what it’s called;
By the poems inside, you’ll be enthralled!
Check out copies, have a look!
On Amazon or Monster Books!
And who is the author of this splendid tome?
Modesty forbids me to make this known.
My Snowman

Hello? Is that the police?
I have a vile crime to report!
Someone has stolen my snowman!
It was safe in my garden, I thought.

Who on earth could have done such a thing?
My mind is all of a muddle!
My snowman was there when in the morning,
Now all that remains is a puddle!

I left him enjoying the sunshine
While I went off out for the day.
But when I came back, there was only his hat –
My snowman’s been taken away!

The same thing happened last year –
These truly are perilous times!
When innocent snowmen and women
Fall victim to such heinous crimes.
Santa

When Santa was a little boy,
No presents came his way.
He never had a gift or toy,
Not one, on Christmas Day.

Christmas time was still such fun,
With halls festooned with holly.
A Christmas feast with Christmas pud,
And everyone was jolly.

People loved the singing,
Such a festive noise!
But no-one thought of giving
Children little toys.

As Santa grew, he changed all this:
He built a busy shed,
Made toys for all the girls and boys
Delivered on a sled.

Soon children were expecting him,
And so were mum and dad,
Who saw how lots of presents
Made their children glad.

Then everyone demanded gifts -
Grown-ups, rich and poor.
The shops all think its brilliant -
But Santa’s not so sure.